Obvious

as in

"Must you be so obvious?"

Variations: "Do you have no tact at all? ... Don’t you have any feelings for me?"

Whatever have you done this time? Punched a doorman? Stripped naked in the street? Shagged a neighbour on the dining room table.... while your parents / her parents were over for dinner?

Now that would be "obvious". Something that you could expect to have confirmed with solid physical evidence. Perhaps even photographs. As you would in a court of law. But this isn’t court. This is a relationship. And there are no laws. So “obvious” in this case means some minor infraction that only her super sensitive radar could possibly pick up.

A rarefied pitch that only her finely turned and ever vigilant warning system would
notice. There is no use asking your friends if they saw you doing anything wrong. And no use asking hers either - they won’t have seen anything but will side with her.

One of the conditions of belonging to the Females of the Universe’s Union of Offence Finders. As for the offence itself, don’t try to think of what you might have done - fastened your seatbelt before she did hers, given a cripple on the tube a seat that she wanted, whatever.

For the sake of harmony, just nod and say, “You are right. I don’t know what I was
thinking of. I will try to do better.”