Fantasy

as in

"My sexual fantasy is ..."

Variations: "I had this dream last night ... Do you want to hear something weird? .... Tell me what your sexual fantasy is .... What do you imagine about sex?"

Oh, boy! There should be a law to cover this area of fantasies, dreams and imaginings. Something like they have to limit pornography, with restrictions on how long he can talk about it and how much detail he can offer. Girls have fantasies, dreams, and imaginings, of course. But these are tasteful. Raunchy,
passionate, even violent perhaps but still, somehow, tasteful.

Whereas ... let’s start with his efforts. The first thing you notice is that he always has more than one girl. It’s as if sex in his fantasies is a like a card game that can’t be played with two people. If you are lucky, he will be thinking in terms of snap which is fine with three - only one extra body - or, at worst, bridge - a mandatory fourth - rather than poker where the options for additions are virtually unlimited. (Never mind that there are times when he would be better to think in terms of solitaire.)

Secondly, in his fantasies, he wants everything to happen to him. He doesn’t want to have to make an effort. (This may sound to you too much like real life but it is the best he can do.)

The women throw themselves at him and are insatiable and he is able to rise to the occasion no matter what they demand. (Stop laughing, please. Even he will admit that this part is pure fantasy. Well, he will at least sometimes.) Finally, if you are lucky, you will be one of the women in his fantasy, perhaps forced to do myriad things with strange women, but at least included.

Now, when it comes to your imaginings, don’t think for a moment that he is looking for a comparable story. One, he will expect you to have only one lover. Two, that lover should be him. And three - you guessed it - he will want you to be insatiable and to make all the running. Sometimes you may be allowed to deviate from this formula and hint at what you really dream about but bear this in mind: he will want you to make clear that such fantasies are just "fantasies" - they could never happen - whereas, be warned, his invariably close with the unspoken phrase "Maybe tomorrow."